sun rise, sun eyes.

Here are a few self-portraits that I took yesterday morning, as the sun rose in the sky, all orange and alive through my bedroom window. Brightening the world before her, she reached out her warm arms and shone smiles of golden light into my sleepy eyes and onto my pale skin, bringing stripes of warmth into the nightshadowy room that I call my own.


Bonjour! :) Sorry it has been another long month (minus a single day) since I last posted- all of my exams took over my life, especially Art and Photog., but now that is all out of my life, I'm going to start dedicating more time to photography, a renew the passion and love I had for it, before college turned it into a chore and endless coursework projects... On top of having photography back in my life, I have all the time in the world to my own disposal, as of last week, because I have officially finished college! :D :D :D FINALLY! Freedom is such a wonderful feeling. Ahh

Well, I haven't taken any self-portraits for such a long time, for various reasons that I shan't bore you with, and I've sort of missed it. I've certainly missed seeing faces looking back at me from my camera screen, although, truth be told, seeing my own face isn't exactly what I'd really like to see! Hopefully, now that I've finished with my college and education for the next four months of summer, I'm going to try to devote some time to being brave and shooting with real models and meeting up with creative and lovely photography people, while of course soaking up the sunshine, hopefully going out with friends and everything (although, I don't know if that'll happen- I don't really know what's really happening right now with my friends... I've become a bit of an outcast, it would seem. :| sigh), going away for a little bit and just have a wonderful time! :) Well, that's the dream, anyways. I'll probably write a blogpost saying how I was too cowardly and shy and how I didn't excercise my photrographic muscles or meet anybody creative and wonderful at all throughout summer. sigh I really want to change the fact that I never do anything I actually want to do! In fact... I think I'm going to make a New (Years) June resolution to be braver and more outgoing to have more fun- I mean, I'm eighteen now and haven't really done anything interesting. I need to not be so self-concious and shy, too. Otherwise, I'm never going to meet up with anyone, for the fear of being rejected, thought of as horribly fat and ugly, and just being plain boring and quiet! Hmm... Hopefully, I'll be able to make some changes and make everything better and myself happier, starting from today. Right here, right now! I want to make this summer one of the best ones, before I go off to the lovely and beautiful seaside city of Swansea for three years for uni... sigh Well, I don't deal with change very well, and don't want to leave home, so that'll be interesting(!)
     I'm hopefully going to be shooting soon, so I'll be posting plenty of work soon :) I just need to reply to, and send off, some emails, plan some thingsn and get this 'being proactive' show on the road! Eee, it's exciting, I hope I can turn this year around and make it much better! Oh, and I'm going to do a post about being featured in the first issuse of ON PAPER magazine, so look out for that- I got it a couple of weeks ago and I'm still grinning from ear to ear like the Cheshire Cat! :D (<-- much like that, in fact) 

I hope you are happy and well, (I apologise for this being so waffley and dull, I just needed to put some thoughts into words.)

Mari-ann xxx

p.s. I just realised, these are some of the first self-portraits I've taken of myself as an eighteen year old, and I hadn't taken any for a couple of month before them either! I mean, I've been eighteen for over three months. Holy moly... time is going so, so fast!

self with sunrise in my eyes - 5:21am.

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